Did you read that title like the 12 days of Christmas? Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive Randommm Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaws! Four calling birds . . . Anyway, I think Deuteronomy is about to get really fun. And by fun I mean “full of laws that I will have no idea what to do with and if taken at face value will … Continue reading
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Moses (M): Hello, Albus. I just wanted to let you know that I have finished my audit of your school. Would you like to know the results? Dumbledore (D): Oh, of course! Please, step into my office. And if Fawkes explodes, pay no mind. He’ll be back. Trust me, resurrection will be a very important … Continue reading
The world is changing. I feel it in the water. I smell it in the air. Much that once . . . wait . . . this is not the beginning of Lord of the Rings. But Galadriel has a point. Things are changing. The Israelites are in the throws of a major shift in … Continue reading
The tag-line of this blog is “blogging through the Bible with irreverent reverence.” Today, I am going to lean heavily on the irreverent side. Heavily. Yesterday I mentioned that Deuteronomy is getting a little repetitive. So I need to find new and creative ways to respond to that repetition. And is there a better way … Continue reading
Alrighty people. Listen up! I am Moses and I have some things to say. Ready? Ready? I see you down there Issachar! Look at me when I’m talking to you! Ok good. Here we go. Actually, I just need to talk to the Reubenites, Gadites, and the Half Tribe of Manasseh, or, Half-asseh. heh heh. … Continue reading
Numbers 33 is a chronicle of the Israelite’s 40-year journey from Egypt to Canaan. There is a little bit at the beginning and a little bit at the end that aren’t this but the rest of the chapter can easily make you want to gouge your eyes out and then gouge out someone else’s eyes … Continue reading
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Numbers 29 is basically a continuation of chapter 28. The two chapters seem to be a recap or quick reference for what sacrifices are required for different regular and special days of the year. I thought about making some more formulas but then stuff got interesting. The last part of the chapter is about the … Continue reading
As happens frequently in Numbers, interesting narrative is interrupted by some laws. These laws don’t seem to flow naturally out of the previous story, but may have some relevance to later stories. We’ll see how this one goes. Numbers 28 is a list of five different times when the Israelites should offer sacrifices. When you … Continue reading
A generation has passed. None save three men witnessed the LORD’s deliverance of his people from Egypt. Every single Israelite was born in the wilderness. Homeless. Nomadic. They’ve never known what a house of stone or brick is like. But that isn’t all bad. Unlike their parents, they’ve never had to make bricks. And now, … Continue reading
Yesterday I was empathetic with our pal, Balak, King of Moab. He wants God to be on his side. He wants God to hate the people he hates. And I think, if we are honest, we are all a lot like that. And some people make it so easy to do! (I’m looking at you … Continue reading